So, it’s too bad no one is here to smell the most amazing cookies I think I’ve ever baked. I have always been a fresh strawberry kind of girl, but if these taste half as amazing as they smell baking, I think I am a convert.

I bought some strawberries last week at Kroger whilst on sale - $1.66 and they actually smelled like strawberries, so how could I resist. And of course they went into the fridge and sat til last night, when I hulled them and sliced them up. I was going to make a Sparkling Grapefruit Pie, but the grapefruit went off, so I punted.

I made serious changes to the recipe, which was obviously written as a “light” dessert (gag). Diet margarine? Can you say fake fat?

Cream Cheese Strawberry Bars
CDKitchen http://www.cdkitchen.com

Category: Fruit Bars and Squares
Serves/Makes: 10 | Difficulty Level: 3 | Ready In: 30-60 minutes

Ingredients:

1 1/2 cup flour
1 1/3 cup sifted flour
3 ounces quick oats
1/2 cup oatmeal
1/4 cup light brown sugar, packed firmly
1/2 teaspoon Cinnamon - I used a Baking Spice blend from Penzy’s
1/2 cup reduced calorie tub margarine, well chilled
1 stick margarine
8 ounces reduced calorie cream cheese (which, ironically, was all I had)
2 tablespoons granulated sugar
1/2 cup egg substitute or egg whites
2 whole eggs
2 tablespoons grated lemon peel
1/2 cup unsweetened coconut
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
Powdered candied ginger, optional
1 1/2 cup fresh strawberries, diced

Directions:
Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Spray 11×7 inch baking pan with nonstick spray. In medium bowl, combine flour, oats, brown sugar and cinnamon. With pastry blender or two knives cut in margarine and 2 tablespoons water until mixture forms a crumbly dough.

I cut the stick of margarine into small squares, then smashed it into the flour/oat mixture with a fork till it looked like it had been incorporated.

Press dough into bottom of prepared pan; bake 10 to 15 minutes until golden.

In small bowl, with mixer on high speed, beat cream cheese and granulated sugar until fluffy. Add eggs, lemon peel and vanilla; beat until smooth. Pour cream cheese mixture over crust.

I took about some of the ginger I had candied, put it in my spice grinder and pulverized the bejeezus out of it. I had about 3 tablespoons of it. Sprinkle powdered candied ginger over the cream cheese stuff, then top evenly with fruit. Bake 25 to 30 minutes until set. I bake it for 15 minutes, rotate the pan, then bake until lightly brown.

Truly, they smell amazing. I am an extravagant baker: I knew that I wanted coconut in the cream cheese, partially for texture - to match the oatmeal in the crust. I like the combo, then I added the ginger because ginger and coconut are natural partners. The strawberries got juicy and wow. It’s like heaven in my kitchen.

Recipe Location: http://www.cdkitchen.com/recipes/recs/325/Cream_Cheese_Strawberry_Bars45098.shtml
Recipe ID: 9271

Addendum: They were bland. Huh. Believe it or not, there’s not enough sugar. So I mixed together:

1/2 cup sifted powdered sugar
2 tablespoons lime juice
1 tablespoon water

Drizzle on top. It adds sweetness and a brightness. Now they are yummy!

Pictures to follow.

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Well, the Won Ton of Deliciousness tanked bigtime. My first mistake was - according to Shannon - buying won ton skin from Kroger, and in retrospect - DUH. Mr. Gillian and I are headed to the Farmer’s Market in Dekalb tomorrow, and maybe I can sneak in a quick trip to Buford Highway and some pho or amazing tofu.

Speaking of Shannon, a side note: Shannon has basically saved my sanity since I found out that my father had passed away. She fed me tofu that day, listens to my weeping, hung out with me on Buford Highway, took me to a shi-shi Asian Bakery, and you kids owe her your thanks. I would have gotten through it, true, but she made it so much bearable.

I need to shake down, er, ask nicely for some recipes from Aunt Dolly. Kristina - George’s wife - has told me Dolly cooks! And Uncle George referred to himself as a Hobo Cook which still makes me giggle. He sounds so much like Daddy when he says that.

I have the ingredients for key lime pie. That was Daddy’s favorite. And I think I will tackle chicken adobo this weekend. My cooking has taken a real dive - I have had more misses than hits. It’s frustrating, albeit understandable.

That said, I need a win, Coach. I am off today through next Tuesday. I have a new camera. I think I can get this back in gear.

And lastly, I’d like to thank Steven, my boss and Mary, both of whom have been great. I am so grateful that I work where I do. They’ve been funny and understanding and compassionate. How often do you get that from your co-workers? Speaking as someone who temped forEVER?

Rarely. I am one lucky girl.

Daddy died on Valentine’s Day. Considering how much he loved my mom, that’s a bittersweet thought.

Sadly, for the past decade or so, and especially after the stroke in 2000, my parents and I have been mildly estranged, but I understand my mom’s been under a lot of stress. She managed to reconcile with sisters and brother Lonnie this last Christmas, according to Aunt Patty the Catwoman.

Mama lost Aunt Margaret sometime the first week of February. Margaret had been waiting for a lung transplant. She’s survived by John, her second husband, her daughter Kelly, Kelly’s twins and her son Glen. That’s all I know about that.

Daddy is survived by Mama, myself, you kids, Elisabeth and her two children, Isabelle and James, Valerie, her son Daniel, and Sarah. He is also survived by his sister Mary Darlene and his youngest brother Anthony George.

But they are both so much more than those plain dry facts. Daddy was a bad ass marine. Margaret ran away from Missouri and became a successful commercial real estate broker in Dallas.

I am so grateful my father is no longer stuck in a wheelchair. I’m so glad Margaret gets to leave her oxygen tank behind. I am relieved that my mom can finally go home.

And I miss them all.

I have been mad wicked busy. Also, I went to see my endocrinologist and got good news: I’ve lost weight! The downside of that is: I need to start monitoring myself more closely and carefully.

As much as I’d like to think I am smart enough and clever enough to post at least once a week, the truth of the matter is I’ve just spent 3o minutes trying to break into this account and the email account I set up for this account. Hmmm…. there HAS to be a better way to remember passwords. The Grand Poobah has been kind enough to grant permission to bring The Laptop of All Secrets to work, but sadly the current job is more fiddly than I am comfortable with.

Anyway, I am still committed to posting. I have ground pork and won ton skins thawing in my fridge even as I write this!

The biggest obstacle are the pictures. The cellphone takes adequate pictures, but then I have to manually transfer each one to the memory card then move it to the laptop, which in no way describes the many steps. Then I have to edit the picture, upload it then futz with picture in a graphics program. Then upload to WordPress… yada yada yada, blah, blah, blah.

You get the drift. I need to step back and get more organized. I actually have more recipes, more pictures, I just don’t have a decent methodology yet!

I can tell you, though, the Fabled Won Ton of Deliciousness is up next.

love,

mom

You kids are driving me crazy.

I’ve been knocking myself out to write up recipes and take pictures and make it pretty, and so far um, the response has been extraordinarily LUKEWARM.

There will be consequences. I’m just saying….

Okay how to make a pot of rice, and no, you don’t need pictures.

• 3 cups water
• 2 cups jasmine rice (or any other, but that’s my preference)

Bring the water to a boil. Add the rice, lower the heat to the lowest setting gas or electric and cover it.

DO NOT MESS WITH IS AT THIS POINT. Leave it alone for 20 minutes. At the end of 20 minutes, it’s done.

I’m also pleased to report I didn’t yell at the Chargers once, and that they actually did good. Go team.

And if I get some frickin’ feedback, I might post the won ton recipe and the Magical Dipping Sauce.

Let’s face it. Pizza ain’t hard. I started yesterday with making the pizza dough. I used Jay’s Signature Pizza Crust from Allrecipes.com. Because I’m running out of flour (surprise), I used a cup of whole wheat flour.

Yowsa. This is an excellent dough. It rose well, and if I had chosen a bigger pan it probably would have been even better.

I pulled it out today, and brought it back to room temperature in the cast iron skillet. When it finally came up to room temperature, I drizzled the whole thing with olive oil, then pre-baked it 450 for 7 minutes.

I slathered on sauce, toppings but no cheese. Here’s a picture of the crust with the toppings.

Baked for 12 minutes, then I topped it with the cheesy goodness. Ten more minutes, and life is good.

This week’s dishes are Vegetarian Pizza and Sweet Rice Krispy Sushi. A little background on why I chose these dishes.

Because it’s Brian’s birthday this week.

I met Brian in eighth grade, because we were both involved in a talent show. I don’t even remember what talent I supposedly had, but Brian played the piano. A Scott Joplin rag, I think. Maybe it was his stand offish air. Maybe it was his musical ability. Maybe it was the puffy blue jacket. I haven’t a clue. I just knew that even with all the other Eighth Grade Drama being played out, I really liked this guy.

I am not a subtle woman. I wasn’t a subtle child. I wear my heart on my sleeve. I know that about myself. I don’t know that I gave him a choice: he was my friend. I was desperate to know more about him, so I gave him an application to sit at “our” lunch table. Yeah, yeah. I know that was slick, wasn’t it? He was gracious enough to play along. As I recall, he listed his address as “I know a cave in NE Tanzania”.

And, no, I never made anyone else submit an application to have lunch with me. Maybe I’d have been better off if I had!

We grew up; he went to Colorado, I had Tony. We both ended up in Vista in 1980. We started hanging out again. He’s Tony’s godfather, as a matter of fact. When I left California, I met your father, and Brian and I drifted apart.

Last summer - poof! He was suddenly back in my life. I found him on Facebook of all places. As you kids know, I haven’t kept in touch with friends from my childhood, and Brian was a huge part of my past. He was our Josh, when I was growing up, the kid who was always around, along with Jamie, Elisabeth’s friend.

I ended up in the Midwest, and eventually the Southeast. He ended up in Chicago. After all these years he is still dry, erudite Brian. Turns out we share a love of jazz, and Miles Davis in particular. My sepia tinted childhood memories are now supplemented with bright shiny new ones. And that makes me glad.

So, why vegetarian pizza? Well what else did Catholic teenagers eat on Friday nights? I mean, really, it was a very big deal when the Pope repealed the whole Fish-On-Friday thing. I have a memory, just a picture really, of myself, Brian and Teresa Lopez at NY Pizza out on East Vista way, getting pizza. It was a cold clear night with a black velvet sky and diamond stars. How good it was, how happy – how content I was in that moment. I can’t figure out why the hell the three of us were together, and certainly the location on East Vista Way was in no way a place we would normally be. I just remember a cool starlit night, a hot pizza with stretchy cheese and great company.

And the rice krispies are because Brian cruelly told me that the very last batch I made when I was 16 would have made EXCELLENT paperweights had they been any heavier. Hmph. Okay, I admit they did suck, but he did not even TRY to be nice about it.

But now, I am, ahem, more mature, so I started thinking: I will show him!

I will make Rice Krispy Treats, and he will have to acknowledge I rock! But I still think they suck (what! They taste like “sweet”!). So I found a way around that. I am making Sweet Rice Krispy Sushi.

Oh, and Brian has told me he is now a Vegetarian (nothing with a face, baby), so the menu makes even more sense, doesn’t it?

Happy Birthday, Brian. You can make fun of my cooking any day, especially if you can duck really fast.

Still crazy, after all these years…..

gil

The sweet sushi was a no-brainer, so of course it nearly defeated me. I made a half batch of the rice crispy treats, and they were simple enough. Mr. Gillian #2 tasted the rice crispy doo-dads before I started messing with them, and pronounced them “yummy”.

HA!

But then I then started (struggling with) melting the stupid white chocolate and regular chocolate and trashed the kitchen and burnt my fingers trying to neatly dip the bases and got tired of waiting for the fuckers to set up and I swear to God, it was that stupid astronaut uniform for Tony’s Cabbage Patch Kid all. Over. Again. *

Overall, I am relatively satisfied with the final results. However, I got so stressed out I ate too much Hagan Daz Rocky Road Ice Cream and wasted spent time yelling at the Chargers for winning. That’s right, winning. If you are a Chargers fan, you understand. If not, well, sucks to be me. Stupid football. Why must you taunt me so?

As you can see from the picture, though, they look good. The ones pictured and the ones I ignored in my frustration are headed off to FP tomorrow. That’s right, I’m foisting them off on my unsuspecting co-workers. Suckers.

I feel like I should try this again, though, because if I were brave, I’d give you the link to the ones that inspired mine. Oh, what the hell, here you go. Go look. My ego can take it. Back? Had a good giggle? Be that way. See if I care! (okay, I do, but whatever)

*In 1986 Tony wanted an Astronaut Cabbage Patch Kid and I couldn’t find one. In my naiveté, I decided to make the uniform for him. And it was the hardest damn thing I’ve ever made! My old sewing machine - hell, all sewing machines - hate lame. I even quilted the helmet. He loved it, but oh, my Lord, it was a nightmare.

Okay, I have a bunch of recipes I’m thinking about trying.

• I am mastering the intricacies of No Knead Bread. In fact, I’m snacking on the Cook’s Illustrated version* right now, and I have Mark Bittman’s in the oven. I added some finely ground herbes de provence to the dough, and dusted it with semolina flour.
• Now I think I will try to make me some cultured butter.
• Tuna meatballs - now that’s an interesting idea. Plus I rarely go wrong with a Jamie Oliver recipe. I have the Iron Chef America episode on my Tivo where The Incomparable Mario Batali battles Jamie Oliver. Blissful Sigh. This sauce - Onion Scented Tomato Sauce by Marcella Hazan looks amazing.
• Mocha Cake with Espresso Drizzle. What else do you need to know? Even though I’m trying hard not to bake, this cake may dissolve my resolve!
• I’m also contemplating a Coq au Vin and a Posole, but haven’t decided on a particular recipe yet. Alton Brown has a version of Coq au Vin that takes several days and multiple bottles of wine.
• Last but not least, I have fallen madly in love with Granola. I made this version first, because I am essentially lazy, and it could be done on top of the stove. Demetrius and I couldn’t quit snacking on it. It’s amazing.

Being Miss Smartypants, I then decided to wing it, and it wasn’t half as good. But I’ve mixed it with boring bran flakes and toss it with some boring diabetic fake fruit yogurt and it’s pretty fucking awesome. At least I’m eating breakfast which should thrill a medical professional, there being so many in my life.

*If you need a log on to see the recipe, let me know.

So, I hope that you guys are actually reading this, and have noticed the changes. I spoke to FP yesterday, and I go back to work on Monday. I’m told that I will be wiped out by Tuesday. Works for me: I need structure!

With a return to work, my time to cook will obviously be curtailed. I’ve been stockpiling recipes and pictures, and have realized that I probably won’t be doing a “cookbook” like my mom did. That what I am doing is recording a year in my kitchen, hence the change in the tag line.

I realize that I spend a lot of time thinking about food. Part of that is a no-brainer. Duh, I’m diabetic. Talking to a friend, I realize that my approach to food is different. Food = Love in our family, and I’ve done my level best to love y’all to death! That’s right, come into my gingerbread house, Wendy. I am trying to fatten you up, dear. But I am also trying to edumacate you, as Homer would say.

Diabetes is a reality each of you needs to look at. Two grandparents and a mom means that the odds are greater you will find yourself with some sort of medical complication. Add in the Cholesterol Curse and Heart Disease and frankly you guys aren’t much better off than me or your father. But you can certainly be smarter and head off the worst of it.

I don’t go out to eat as much as I did because food is a series of land mines. What’s in this? What will it do to my sugars? Yeah, I drive through McDonald’s way too much, but at least I know what’s in it (more or less). I know how my body will react (badly). But I also try to do more things at home. I got real macho one year and even got a tortilla press and made my own tortillas - which, by the way, are just as bad as white bread, carbwise.

I have picked up skills and techniques and learned, learned, learned. At Christmas Cook’s Illustrated sent me an offer I couldn’t refuse: half off a membership to their incredibly awesome website. I discovered the Awesome Power of RSS last year, and have so many cooking and food blogs syndicated that I am actually breaking them out by category, because I am just Super Geeky that way.

BTW, you should be syndicating this site, so that when I update you will be automatically notified. I’ve been using Google Reader and Bloglines, plus I’ve been watching my site in Thunderbird. Yesterday I switched to FeedDemon on Lifehacker’s recommendation. I’m still getting used to it, but it looks pretty good. If interested, lemme know and I will hook you up, cuz I’m just awesome that way.

I have a lot of plans for this site. It’s tough being so far away from each of you. I was almost apologizing to a friend for my, er, obsession with food and all yummy food related topics with a “well, food meant love in my family”.

He said “There are worse ways to show love than food.”

Made me feel better, because it’s true.

xoxox

mom